That's no way of living, kid, if all you know is what a few people tell you then you're no different from a puppet. A being without a heart, without a will and without a personality.
You have to question things, question what people tell you, ask others about what other people tell you. And I don't mean people who are in the same organized group like that Organization you mentioned, people outside of it. Ask people what means to have a heart and then think about how you have lived so far, what you have done when no one was telling you what to do exactly, how you reacted to things and decide yourself if you have one. Same for your existence.
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That's no way of living, kid, if all you know is what a few people tell you then you're no different from a puppet. A being without a heart, without a will and without a personality.
You have to question things, question what people tell you, ask others about what other people tell you. And I don't mean people who are in the same organized group like that Organization you mentioned, people outside of it. Ask people what means to have a heart and then think about how you have lived so far, what you have done when no one was telling you what to do exactly, how you reacted to things and decide yourself if you have one. Same for your existence.