[That's an answer that comes easily. Marco was getting ready to throw himself as big as when fighting Kizaru, to absorb everything Ikki could throw if needed and then some, but it never came. So much like him, if he hadn't found Whitebeard, if he'd been a touch more like Ace, if if if...]
Because I've already been empty.
[It's so easy.]
[Ikki had Shun. His whole time, just like Ace had Luffy.]
[But before Whitebeard? There was nothing.]
[And if anything Blackbeard's black holes remind him of it. Trying to return him to that point. Because there really was nothing.]
You protect Shun. And now you have me, Ace, and this crew.
Even knowing one day you'll lose them, can you give up?
I've seen that darkness already Ikki. There's nothing there.
I have something to lose now, aye, but only because I gained enough to reach here in the first place.
[He remembers what Thatch told him when they first tried to enter the forest, before Thatch and Marco started having panic attacks from it all. He shifts his feet again to curl completely around the front of Ikki's chest.]
[So much pain.]
I won't let you go back to that darkness. No matter how much pain we endure, nothing is ever as bad as that.
[And it's true really. Even if he does hurt Robin, even if he does wind up hating himself, if she lived in that cold isolation alone, it'd be worse. At least she has nakama, at least he has nakama. And yes, it means trusting both their nakama to be strong enough to deal with it no matter what, but to do anything else is to move backwards. And Marco's never going back there again.]
Why are we in this forest now even though we hate it? Even though it hurts? Because that's who we are. I don't care if no one, but you ever understands it, you're still one more than I ever could have asked for or dreamed of.
[Because it was better than dreams. Better than his own damn imagination. Better than any expectations.]
There's a poem, my Pops loves. No man is an island. It means everyone is connected, and we all affect each other like it or not. Pops knew it better than anyone in the universe I think. That's why he was so much like his earthquakes. He understood how the tiny ripples could effect everything hundreds of leagues away. People too. When I panicked at Marineford, Jozu lost his arm to Aokiji, an admiral in this world now. Because Jozu got scared for me when I was scared for Pops. Whatever we do, whatever we do, it will always cause extra ripples. But that doesn't mean we can give up, because even that has ripples.
Instead, we have to try to place our ripples as best as we can. I'm not as wise as Pops so I don't know how everything will carry on. There are always so many angles and hidden pieces, and misleading turns.
[He thinks for a long moment, looking off into the distance of the forest, and then up at the sky again.]
I have never once thought I had much to gain with Robin. I can only see it ending in hell, but thank you my brother. I must try. It was never the end I needed to be concerned about.
[It's himself. Robin wouldn't want him hurt, and crew rifts would only happen if he's not strong enough. Ikki wasn't able to protect himself and Selphie didn't even know how much she was devastating him. It helps. It's terrible and awful, and it helps. Because now Marco knows exactly what to say and how to say it. Before his pride would have gotten in the way, but now, he can see the step that he can take first instead of just straight up trying to fly the sheer cliff, it's okay to take the first step on the way, especially when he's been going this slowly.]
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Because I've already been empty.
[It's so easy.]
[Ikki had Shun. His whole time, just like Ace had Luffy.]
[But before Whitebeard? There was nothing.]
[And if anything Blackbeard's black holes remind him of it. Trying to return him to that point. Because there really was nothing.]
You protect Shun. And now you have me, Ace, and this crew.
Even knowing one day you'll lose them, can you give up?
I've seen that darkness already Ikki. There's nothing there.
I have something to lose now, aye, but only because I gained enough to reach here in the first place.
[He remembers what Thatch told him when they first tried to enter the forest, before Thatch and Marco started having panic attacks from it all. He shifts his feet again to curl completely around the front of Ikki's chest.]
[So much pain.]
I won't let you go back to that darkness. No matter how much pain we endure, nothing is ever as bad as that.
[And it's true really. Even if he does hurt Robin, even if he does wind up hating himself, if she lived in that cold isolation alone, it'd be worse. At least she has nakama, at least he has nakama. And yes, it means trusting both their nakama to be strong enough to deal with it no matter what, but to do anything else is to move backwards. And Marco's never going back there again.]
Why are we in this forest now even though we hate it? Even though it hurts? Because that's who we are. I don't care if no one, but you ever understands it, you're still one more than I ever could have asked for or dreamed of.
[Because it was better than dreams. Better than his own damn imagination. Better than any expectations.]
There's a poem, my Pops loves. No man is an island. It means everyone is connected, and we all affect each other like it or not. Pops knew it better than anyone in the universe I think. That's why he was so much like his earthquakes. He understood how the tiny ripples could effect everything hundreds of leagues away. People too. When I panicked at Marineford, Jozu lost his arm to Aokiji, an admiral in this world now. Because Jozu got scared for me when I was scared for Pops. Whatever we do, whatever we do, it will always cause extra ripples. But that doesn't mean we can give up, because even that has ripples.
Instead, we have to try to place our ripples as best as we can. I'm not as wise as Pops so I don't know how everything will carry on. There are always so many angles and hidden pieces, and misleading turns.
[He thinks for a long moment, looking off into the distance of the forest, and then up at the sky again.]
I have never once thought I had much to gain with Robin. I can only see it ending in hell, but thank you my brother. I must try. It was never the end I needed to be concerned about.
[It's himself. Robin wouldn't want him hurt, and crew rifts would only happen if he's not strong enough. Ikki wasn't able to protect himself and Selphie didn't even know how much she was devastating him. It helps. It's terrible and awful, and it helps. Because now Marco knows exactly what to say and how to say it. Before his pride would have gotten in the way, but now, he can see the step that he can take first instead of just straight up trying to fly the sheer cliff, it's okay to take the first step on the way, especially when he's been going this slowly.]