high_seas | We need to talk

Entry tags:

We need to talk

Who: Dave and Grell
Where: Grell's cabin.
When: 3/16
What: She had a special visitor last night and Dave is upset.
Warnings: Dave's mouth.
Style: Whatever's clever.
Status: Closed.

Dave is practically Grell's shadow. He isn't with her all the time, but he keeps tabs on her as much as possible. When they're apart he's usually aware of where she is. Call him overprotective. They live in a dangerous place, and as strong as Grell is, she's been kidnapped before. He doesn't want it to happen again.

He's aware that she had company in the galley on the 15th because he was there. Dave abandoned his old room and has stayed in hers ever since he got back. It's not unusual for him to go looking for her if she's not in bed at a decent hour. He saw the lights on in the galley, but before he opened the door he heard voices.

Most people have no idea just how sneaky Dave can be. He's usually loud and ostentatious, but he has catlike reflexes and can move around in silence if he wants to. It's not like he intended to spy on them, it's just that the conversation sounds intimate. Maybe not in a romantic sense, but it is clear that the two of them are close.

She had said something earlier, on the journal, about him dating her. Dave was listening, though he never said anything. It sounded like this guy was two timing her and some other girl while he was gone. It pissed Dave off, but Grell doesn't need him to defend her.

The fact that she's meeting the same guy in relative privacy, though? He doesn't know what to think about that.

So he spends the rest of the night obsessing about it. He listens to their conversation for awhile, but it delves into talk about people he doesn't know and he gets bored and frustrated. Dave steps away. He paces the deck. He tries to remember the conversation from the journal line-by-line. Grell said this guy was a liar and a poser, that she didn't want him, and that she was glad Dave was back.

...but she also asked why he didn't ask her out. She sounded pretty upset about that.

God this is stupid. He's taking the worst possible aspects of this and blowing them way out of proportion. He knows he is. This is just a social call, or some shit. It's not like he brought her flowers or anything.

All the same, Dave can't shake the feeling that there are things he doesn't know about Grell. Things that maybe the other guy does. And that rubs him the wrong way.

When it sounds like they're getting ready to leave he makes his way to the Hemlock and sails off. Dave needs time to think. He can't go back to bed right now. When Grell returns to her cabin she won't find him there.

He stays out all night. Sailing nowhere in particular. Nearly getting himself lost because he's shit at navigating. Early in the morning he returns to the ship. Dave goes back to his old room for the first time since he got back. He fixes his hair and straightens his clothes until he looks charming again, not like a nervous wreck who's been up all night wondering if his girlfriend is thinking about leaving him.

Then he walks over to Grell's cabin and knocks on the door. Barging in just seems wrong. He isn't sure he belongs here anymore.

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The late night dinner conversation with Marco went over much better than she could ever expect. Meaning it came out of left field and caught her off guard like a sucker punch. What started out as feeling quite hurt over being used as an object to pass around two men with their brains between their legs, ended up being a worthwile experience. With being very preoccupied, she didn't notice if anyone would be eavesdropping, since the crew would mostly be asleep, but it wouldn't be as if she'd care. Much...

Throughout all this, she did forget about Dave. Not in the sense of she didn't care about him, but in the sense that there was a lot consuming her mind at the time. She didn't expect him to notice her not being around late at night, and she probably wasn't aware he kept any tabs on her. If she had known, she...probably would be flattered.

So once the dinner was done and her company departed, she did return to her cabin. Finding Dave not there, she had simply thought he would be around later. When the morning came and she woke up alone, Grell thought it odd. Dave would have at least said good morning to her if he got an early start.

After getting dressed, Grell heard a knock at the door. Maybe it was Arthur needing something from her. Not many other people in the crew would bother knocking to visit her as often as he did. She crossed the floorspace to open the door, doing so with a smile.

Expecting Arthur, and not Dave, on the other side, made her smile drop when it wasn't her country standing there. What was going on?

"...why are you knocking?" It seemed so...odd for him to do so. "Where were you, come to think of it."

"Just went out for a late night sail and got kinda lost." Dave grins. That sounds so much better than the truth. Maybe he should stick to that story? Just smile and lie and pretend that nothing's wrong. Dave's good at that. It something he's done a lot of, as a celebrity. Grell seems fine, so maybe he really was worried about nothing? "Guess I'm a little tired, let's go back inside."

But, no. He knows he has to say something. It's just that, for the life of him, he has no idea what.

How do you even talk about something like this? He can't just go up to Grell and ask her, Hey babe, have you been seeing other guys? Because that would be rude and presumptive. Maybe he should re-phrase it to something like, Listen, I'm a paranoid asshole who's afraid of losing you to someone you're probably not even interested in.

Yeah, no.

That answer wasn't so farfetched, so she believed it. Taking his hand, she gently lead him inside and closed the door behind him.

"All night?" Grell asked with concern. Why didn't he ask for help? Maybe he was too prideful, but he did manage to get back, so it worked out. However...

"So why knock on the door?" She pointed a finger to his nose. "And don't try to say you were being a gentleman." Dave was usually one, but she never thought he would ever need to knock first.

"I said I was tired!" He laughs. The pointing is making him nervous. Dave feels like he's being interrogated. This is ridiculous. He backs away from Grell and heads toward the bed.

"I got turned around when I climbed on deck and ended up stumbling into my old room. It took me awhile to figure out which door was yours." He was there, so it's not a complete lie. She could even dust the room for fresh finger prints. Dave pulls his jacket off and tries to think. Shit, can he say? "I wasn't sure, so I knocked. Can you imagine if I walked in on Arthur instead?"

If Dave keeps acting like this he's going to have to pretend that he's drunk in addition to being tired and disoriented. He could lie and say he took a bottle of rum along for the trip. That is definitely something he would do. Sail off into the middle of nowhere, get drunk off his ass, and then come back the next day and nearly stumble into someone else's room.

Rolling her eyes, Grell did smile a bit, but not a lot. His story was sounding a bit more unbelieving. She watched his take off his jacket, offering a hand to take it from him. No use in getting it wrinkled.

"Yet, you had enough coordination to knock, despite the fatigue..." she stated before sighing softly. "If you were truly tired, you would have just walked in." She didn't want to have a lack of faith in what he was telling her, but it was just...something odd about it all. She gave a wave of a hand, not wanting to argue about it. It was silly. "I'm just making something out of nothing, surely."

Dave gives his jacket to Grell and then starts unfastening the buttons on his shirt, but he stops after the first two. It probably wouldn't be a good idea to get undressed for this conversation. It could be taken the wrong way. He isn't actually going back to sleep yet, and he feels vulnerable enough already.

That last thing she says is too close to what he was thinking and it takes the wind out of his sails. Maybe it really isn't anything to worry about, but he doesn't know. He needs to know.

"So, I heard you had company last night."

As she was draping his jacket nearly across a chair, Grell stopped mid-stroke of straightening the fabric. Not that she hadn't wanted anyone to notice that Marco came over. He wasn't outright banned from the ship. It just seemed a bit odd at how their conversation went earlier, even though the shouting was done privately.

Grell turned to Dave, wearing a light smile on her face. Was this why he went for a night sail? It couldn't have been a coincidence.

"I didn't think anyone was awake to notice," she replied with a shrug. "Why?"

She's so casual about this it hurts. He stayed up all night worrying and she's acting like it doesn't even matter.

Once again Dave is speechless. Was she cheating on him? Is she cheating on him? What is the nature of her relationships with that ma- No. He has no right asking any of those questions. But yes, he was awake to notice.

"You never told me you wanted a family."

Shit. That was also the wrong thing to say. Now she knows he was listening in on the conversation. Fuck.

That was very much the wrong thing to say. It was as if cold water had been dumped over her as she dropped her smile and stared at him in shock. So he did go sailing off because of that!

The expression that transforms on her features was of...hurt, but definitely pure rage. Her fists clenched tightly, as did her teeth. Look who was being so casual now! He blurted it out as if it was about the weather!

"Because you NEVER bloody asked!" And now she'll yank the jacket from the chair and fling it at him! "THAT'S WHY!" Oh, her rage was only starting to build up.

The jacket hits him in the face. Dave just stands there and lets it. It gets stuck half-way over his head, so he pulls it down after a few seconds and folds it in his arms. He seems calm, but he isn't. There are just too many emotions and he can't bring himself to express any of them.

"Yeah, well... you didn't have to go running off to chat with another guy about it."

Because clearly that is the problem here. Maybe he didn't ask, but how the hell was he supposed to know? No one ever tells him shit. Why does everyone else get to know these things about Grell while he doesn't?

It kind of made her more annoyed that he was being so calm about this. Does she need to kill someone to get a reaction?!

Grell rolled her eyes and placed her hands on her hips.

"He has been asking me that question for over a YEAR! He's been ninety percent honest with me from the very. Start. What did you expect?! You haven't even asked ONCE!"

She really couldn't believe what she was hearing from his mouth. Marco asked countless times in the year she has known him, and Dave hadn't asked at all! So of course she would tell him, albeit reluctantly.

There's a reason Dave didn't ask. Lots of reasons, actually. It's not like he ever had a proper family, or even an improper one. How could he ask about something he doesn't have?

Even if he wanted to make a family of his own, Dave never got that close to anyone. His past relationships didn't last. Maybe it's different here, but even so, Grell wasn't capable of having children until quite recently. Wouldn't it have been insensitive to ask about that when her body was incapable of it?

"I already told you. Dirk and Rose were all the family I had. And Roxy. I mean, I never met her, but..."

It kinda hurts that he doesn't have anything to offer Grell. Not like Marco does, anyway. There's no close-knit group of friends that he could induct her into like a big, happy family. Aside from her crew? He's got nothing.

The wind went out of her metaphorical sails as she sighed. This was all a mess. Giving Dave a weary look, Grell adjusted her glasses a bit.

"Was that why you stayed out all night?" His story wasn't all that well thought out, if she reviewed it more. "Do you think I'm replacing you? Because I don't tell you everything?" It could imply that she had more to tell, which was true. "I don't think we know each other well enough to not have a need to be discreet..."

"I don't know."

It sounds so stupid when she says it like that. But yeah. Dave was kinda worried about being replaced.

"I guess I felt like, I was gone for awhile. You had no way of knowing if I'd ever come back. Maybe you felt like you wanted to move on at some point? I can understand that. I never expected you to wait for me."

And he was pleasantly surprised when she welcomed him back as though he were never really gone. But he was. And things happened while he was gone. There's no point in ignoring it.

"You don't have to stay with me."

There was a silence between them after Dave spoke. Mostly because Grell didn't know what to say, and was thinking of something for a response. Moving to cross her arms, Grell turned her attention to the side a bit.

"You're correct, I could have never predicted your return. I could have just moved on with my life. And I did try, obviously. But now look," she said, looking to Dave and gesturing with her arms at everything around them. "I get burned for trying, and burned more for trying to..." While she thought of the proper word, a hand made circular motions to help along the process somehow. "Not try"

Having yet to put on gloves, Grell raked her fingers through her hair roughly. Marco was one of her few close friends here, so settling the matter was of importance to her. And now she felt as if that wasn't even allowed. Grell began pacing in agitation, as to her, this all seemed ridiculously unfair. This was why she always denied herself family. It was as if she was destined to not have one.

"Yes, I don't have to be with you, but I want to. Yes, I do want a family..." Yet even as she said it, Grell couldn't convince herself if she deserved either. A tight feeling spread in her chest that she couldn't shake. The pacing didn't help, so Grell paused with clenched fists at her sides. Then she blurted out an epiphany after a moment, mixed with a derisive chuckle.

"My wants don't truly matter." Despite the bleak statement, she was grinning. What else was she supposed to do? Cry? She hadn't cried in centuries, and she certainly wouldn't start now, in front of anyone.

Dave resists the urge to say something bad about Marco. He's already being an insecure asshole and he doesn't want to add jealousy to the list. He watches Grell rake her fingers through her hair, pace the room, and clench her fists. He wants to touch her, to comfort her, but he isn't sure now is the right time. He waits until she's done talking and puts his hands on her shoulders.

"Yes they do." What she wants means everything to him. Dave realizes that he hasn't been so great about showing it though. He doesn't even know how to feel about family. It's always been such a loaded subject for him. He lets go of her shoulders and looks away, trying to focus. "I couldn't have a family."

He shakes his head and starts pacing. "I know I never told you much about my world, even though I'm always referencing it, but there was this sea witch and she was hunting me down, ok? She was killing my actors and if I ever had a girlfriend for very long, she might've been killed too." It's hard to get close to anyone when you know anyone who gets close to you is risking their lives.

"I couldn't ask anyone to do that. I couldn't get married or have kids. Shit, I was afraid to even make friends because the friends I had wound up dead." Dave throws his hands up in exasperation. Like it wasn't bad enough that his sister was the only person he had in the whole world and that Dirk and Roxy were so far in the future that he'd never have been able to meet either of them if it weren't for the fact that Dirk had shown up here, however briefly.

"I'm just not supposed to get close to anybody. I'm supposed to live my life alone and die alone because that's what's in the stars for me. I kill things, everything around me dies, and I guess at some point I decided I didn't want a family because it doesn't hurt if you can't have something you don't want." And he still can't bring himself to say he does want a family, even though it's true.

"Shit, I don't even know how to make a relationship work. I never kept anyone around this long. I never argued with anyone before. I just... I did nothing. I let them walk away. They always did."

Dave's hands on her shoulders stabilized her emotions a little, but not entirely. Listening to more about his world, and his life, made her realize just how similar his situation is her own. It was depressing, but Grell gave a sad smile as she placed her hand onto his arm.

"That's an awful situation, and unfair. Yet, it describes my life almost perfectly. Surrounded by DEATH, living just close enough to others to feel their warmth, becoming a target of a sea witch, and..." She sighed softly before continuing. "Having only a sliver of a clue of what you're doing in a relationship this long. It all sounds miserable."

She had been in many relationships before, but only this one meant anything. Being miserable with him sounded like something she'd want to do.

"But, tell me, what do you want, Dave?" She still had no real clue about his own wants.

"I wanna stay with you." Dave wraps his arms around Grell and hugs her tightly. He isn't sure what else to say. His feelings about family are so confusing that he doesn't know what he wants sometimes. He just doesn't want to be alone.

While he's hugging Grell he realizes that he's been sabotaging himself. He was so afraid of losing her that it almost became a self-fulfilling prophecy. Dave didn't mean to push her away. He never wanted to. It's just that he's so used to doing it that he doesn't know how to stop. It's not like he ever had a choice before.

"Shit, I think we're the most hopeless couple ever." Because it really does sound like her life was just as horrible and complicated as his and it's obvious that neither of them have a clue what they're doing. "We're a couple harbingers of death and we wanna have babies."

Dave isn't sure how ironic he's being with that last statement. Does he really mean that? Oh shit, yes he does. Dave is going to laugh. He's going to cry. He's going to do both at once and break down into a sobbing, grinning mess because he could never have a family before and now he has a chance.

Wrapping her own arms around Dave, Grell nodded and held him tight. She hadn't ever heard anyone say that to her in her entire existence, so it felt really good to hear. It felt more like a fairytale than her actual life. "I'd like that very much, Dave," she said, trying her best to not cry. This was quite an emotional event for her. In fact, the entire twenty-four hours have been a complete roller coaster emotionally.

She couldn't help but laugh along with him, because they were very much the bringers of death. They were very much hopeless. And, indeed, they both did want children. "No wonder we didn't win that contest." Surprisingly, she didn't care about not winning. Dave was back with her, and the fact that Faye and Thash won made things better. Grell pulled back a bit so she could lift up his glasses and see his eyes, using gentle fingers to wipe away tears with a smile. She didn't think any less of him for shedding them.

"I apologize if I've hurt you. That wasn't my intention. I just needed to sort things out."

Edited 2015-03-26 22:31 (UTC)

Dave sobs into Grell's shoulder for awhile. He hasn't ever cried in front of someone and it's embarrassing, so he wipes the tears from his eyes and stops chuckling under his breath, because what the fuck was that? He sounds like an overemotional idiot.

"We probably scared the shit out of them." Dave thought they looked great of course, but yeah. In other people's eyes they're probably more intimidating than charming. That's just what happens when you and your girlfriend are both a couple of badass motherfuckers.

"No, you didn't... I mean, you didn't mean to." He isn't even sure what to say to that. He wasn't expecting Grell to apologize. There's nothing to apologize for. "I was being stupid and jealous and I shouldn't have done that. You should be able to have friends over and talk to them without me spying on you. It was a dick move, and I'm sorry. I didn't even mean to do it, it just happened. But I never should have been jealous in the first place."

That was exactly why she doesn't cry. Plus, it made her eyes puffy and ruins mascara. She didn't have time for ugliness.

"At least you care enough to be angry and jealous. I can overlook the eavesdropping. This time," Grell gave him a light smile, sighing. "There's a lot you still don't know about me, though." If they were being honest with each other, then she wanted to tell him the truth about everything. It seemed unfair for Dave to not know when Arthur did. "Are you still tired?"

He did say he had been out all night on Hemlock and wanted to nap.

"Yeah, but... let's talk in bed."

Dave smiles softly and finishes unbuttoning his shirt. He is really fucking tired, but he doesn't think he could fall asleep right now even if he tried. There are too many thoughts racing through his head.

So maybe if he slips into something more comfortable and they talk about their lives for awhile he can calm down enough to go to sleep? He wants to hear all about Grell.

"And I mean talk, like... that's not a sexual innuendo this time."

Grell was about to ask if that was an innuendo, but then he cleared that up. Nodding, she began to undress, even though she only recently got dressed. Deciding to only remove her corset and skirt, Grell is left with her blouse and stockings and climbs into bed. She couldn't blame Dave for being a bit too wired for sleep right now.

So she waited for him, stretching s bit. "Don't forget to remove your sunglasses." Grell liked seeing his red eyes.

Dave strips down to his boxers, but he leaves them on and then climbs under the covers. He's too lazy to go get his pajamas, but it was cold outside and he doesn't want to lie on top of the blankets.

"Do I have to?" He says that teasingly as he removes his shades. He really doesn't mind.

At his question, Grell shook her head with a smile in response as Dave climbed inside. Sitting up on her side with an elbow to prop her up, she took one of Dave's hands and brought it to her neck. She really liked how warm he felt, in comparison to how she usually felt. Generating that much heat must be nice.

"Tell me what you feel." Simply telling him she had no heartbeat, that she was dead, may be a little much to swallow all in one gulp right now.

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