high_seas | A Water Park with Hammers

[rolls his eye so hard at both of you.

And then follows it up with a smack to the back of Luffy's head]

Don't say that so loud! Geez. Fine, whatever, enjoy your naked mermaids. As long as the drinks are good.

[Rolling his eyes, too, almost exactly at the same time. He turns to face forward again, ambling along.]

Zoro ain't getting naked me at a shitty bar. He's just gonna have to suffer through boobs and fins.

[But he'll buy the green dolt a drink or two for putting up with Sanji's ogling.

...Of the wooden mermaids, sob.]

You remember where it is, Luffy?

[his head is knocked forward by Zoro and he laughs, then nods at Sanji's question]

Yup! And fireworks. And you get a booby prize if you can do a drinking challenge thing. But I dunno what it is.

[he's not really interested in boobies. In any case he leads them unerring to The Mermaids Purse and there are a whole lot of naked wooden mermaids and paintings too and one picture half covered by a curtain. There's also a huge aquarium dominating one wall and filled with pirhana and this Luffy plops by]

Pretty cool, na!

[Oho, now this is a bar. Zoro goes totally smug when the mermaids aren't real and meanders along behind Luffy. Of course he'd want to sit by the damn bitey fish.]

Yep, this place is right up your ally, cook. Looks like I really have to suffer. [snort]

So what's this about a drinking challenge?

[Sanji's so busy eagerly looking around for NAKED MERMAIDS~!!! that it takes him a few steps into the place before he realizes that......there actually aren't any.

Just the wooden ones.

And fucking paintings.

That aren't real.

He slows to a stop several feet away from the seats Luffy picked out, letting out a long groan and then just pouting with a pathetically sad look.]

You should have to suffer! Why should I have to when it's my birthday??

[You know, like a week ago or whatever, psh, details.

Though the mention of a "booby prize" does drift into his ear and he somewhat warily perks up. Those words coming from Luffy, though, you never know.]

It's pretty cool, though, right? And the bar guy said you could touch Big Sis if you paid.

[there's a very largely endowed wooden mermaid hanging over the bar lovingly labled "big sis"]

The drinking thing you gotta drink three of those glasses without dying.

[see? Boobs and beer! Did he find the perfect bar or what?]

Let's get some beef nachos, too.

[he says as he has his nose pressed to the glass and is watching the fish go by]

Edited 2015-03-08 06:58 (UTC)

[follows Luffy's pointing and...

HOLY SHIT JACKPOT!

The biggest, dumbest grin slides across his face.]

Challenge accepted. Call the bartender over.

[Glances around hopefully at "Big Sis" -- only to immediately droop again.

Goddammit.

He sighs loudly and slumps into a seat, bending over to let his head land on the bar with a thud, even as he raises a hand to flag down the bartender. Then he turns his face enough so that he can glower at the other two, not that Luffy is looking. Hmph.]

I ain't carrying your ass back to the ship if you pass out or some shit.

[LOL PLEASE he's not stupid, just moping. There's no way Zoro can't handle three of those glasses. Sanji will just stick with one for now, though, thanks much.]

I wanna do it too! [flops back down in his seat] Na, Zoro, I bet I can drink more than you.

[but then he glances at Sanji's grumpy face]

Don't you wanna touch Big Sis?

Oh, you think so? Then let's see who can really drink the most.

[he knows full well that rubber belly can hold a lot of liquid, but can he keep from passing out before Zoro does?

And really, three glasses that size are definitely going to get him buzzed. The bartender gives them both a dubious look, but a challenge is a challenge and hell yeah, both of them are gonna do it.]

[Waves a hand at Luffy and forces himself to sit up as the bartender deposits their drinks in front of them.]

Maybe later.

[AKA no. 8|

Not while he's still sober, anyway.

As he picks up his mug and promptly downs half of it in one go just because fuck this place and their not real naked mermaids orz orz orz.]

[looks at Sanji with his chin resting on his hands]

We can go somewhere else if you don't like it here. [cuz it's no fun if Sanji's just gonna be annoyed]

He'll be fine. [Zoro is quite sure of it, as he downs nearly half of that glass in one go.] You got his hopes up, talking about boobs. [gives Sanji an extremely knowing look over the rim of the glass] He'll get over it.

[Glowers right back at him over the rim of his own glass, but then he winces a little because ugh chugging booze, that was dumb and not at all how his body likes to handle alcohol. Nngh. He sighs and sets the glass down heavily on the bar, then rubs at the bridge of his nose briefly before waving Luffy off again.]

Nah, I'm fine. [Glares at Zoro.] I'm over it.

[He props an elbow on the bar and rests his cheek against his hand, eyes drifting to one of those mermaid paintings.]

...I just really like boobs. [Annnd then his voice goes a bit dreamy, because it's actually quite a nice piece of art.] They're so lovely~

Mmmm. [he doesn't see why but] Zoro let's win that prize.

[cuz Sanji'd really like a thing like that. He picks up the glass and chugs it down but it's super bitter and it makes his toes curl and there are no fizzy fireworks in it but he wants to win one or maybe even two for Sanji so he works really hard on getting it all in his belly]

[leaving the cook to his daydreams for a minute, Zoro nods to Luffy and upends his glass, finishing off the rest just as quickly. The bartender looks positively aghast that they both managed the first glass and he will indeed have to fill two more]

Ahh. Not the best beer I've ever had, but not the worst. I can do two more.

[Will happily allow himself to be distracted for a few minutes by that painting, as well as the others around the room, turning in his seat to lean back against the bar as he admires them. He continues to sip at the bottom half of his drink, figuring the sooner he finishes it, the sooner he can move onto something less shitty. There's a dopey smile on his face, as per usual, since some of the paintings are rather risqué~]

Haha I guess you like this place after all, huh, Sanji? Maybe we can steal some of the paintings!

[though that gets him a glower he doesn't seem to notice]

MORE BEER AND FOOD! And this time make it a super big glass! I'm gonna beat Zoro all the way down!

[yes, cook, go and drool all you want. He's not threatened by paintings, not after yesterday's little chat. Ahem. No, Zoro is pretty much one-track-mind on the beer over here.]

No way. Bring both of mine! I'll finish 'em off so we can get the prize and then drink for real.

[Snaps out of it a bit when he hears his name.]

Eh? [Spins back around so he's facing the bar again.] Uh, yeah, it's...yeah. [SHRUG.] I guess it's alright.

[Takes another gulp of his drink, then points at Luffy.]

Next time take me somewhere that has real girls, though.

[Though his comments probably get lost beneath their shouts for more booze. He rolls his eyes, downing the rest of his glass and then snagging the bartender.]

Oi, when you're done serving the pair of idiots, get me some rum. The shitty good stuff.

[he heard it! He's just busy cramming his mouth full of two big handfuls of nachos and then draining the second beer half way before setting it down, half his face and hair covered with foam]

hahaha maybe we can just put boobs on Zoro. [he doesn't know any bars with girls in them all the time]

[he's halfway through the second glass when he hears that, and nearly chokes. No fair, Luffy! The beer needs to go down his throat, not up his nose!]

What is it with the two of you and putting boobs on me?! That's weird! You're both weird.

[hmm, that beer might be hitting him harder than he expected]

[...Haaaaa, okay well that finally has him breaking out in snickers as he nurses a new tumbler filled with rum. He gives Zoro an appraising look.]

I'm telling you, marimo-kun, there are islands we can go to and find out just how weird it is or ain't. I've heard things.

[Or seen in the journal, whatever.]

Shishishi Then he'll be an okama!

[Drains the rest of his beer]

Gimmie more! GIMMIE MORE!

NO! [points at Sanji first, then Luffy.] No. No. I'm happy with the equipment I got, I don't need to experiment.

[oh shit Luffy is ahead of him. Wait, was this a contest of speed or volume? Right, volume. But Zoro can't be left in the dust, so he finishes glass two in a massive chug and moves on to number three right away.]

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